Here we are y’all,
Another day, another…chance to say yes to my muthafeckin self!
This week we discuss:
How to show up for our bods
Inequities in healthcare
Being your own health advocate
Assigning yourself a health advocate — for those big decisions or tricky times — like having a baby, or navigating disease, or debating a surgery, or which doctor to choose, or how to accomplish your health goals.
Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.
-Rainer Maria Rilke
I don’t know about you, but this week was big for me.
We had a hefty storm sweep over the island, and it rained and rained and rained. The Hawaiian Islands haven’t seen two named storms in a row pass through the archipelago in almost a quarter century. Things are stirring! The second one is actually coming in as I write this, the rain just started pounding on our tin roof, and we are feelin’ it!
My Elaine (my caregiver/friend/roommate, also known by her beautiful Jewish name, Orah) was out of town on a healing retreat on Maui, so I had the house to myself, and therefore took an opportunity to host a little stay-at-home retreat for #1 :)
I went into this week with the intention of prioritizing my body. So I made a list that answered the questions:
What does my body need right now? What do I need right now? And I let the truth come out:
Sleep in
Find restful time between work as a new routine. For example — write, meditate, write, dance/workout, answer emails, snack, and so on…
Also on the list:
Last week’s Full Moon Ceremony with Mystery Cult
Lomi Lomi massage
Sweet sweet lovin’
Self Pleasure
Girls’ Night
Breathwork Daily
Microdose mushrooms
And while I didn’t accomplish ALL of these, I didn’t put the pressure on myself to do so, and that allowed me to feel really good about what I did accomplish for myself.
It wasn’t about checking everything off the list, it was about prioritizing my health and then seeing what I could do that felt right and good in my body for that day.
Actually, the only thing I didn’t do was microdose, (hehe) simply because I was jiving so much with my flow that I felt like I didn’t need to add it in. (Yes, it was a fun week.) Whereas the weeks before, a lil’ mushrooms felt like medicine pulling me through a depression — more on that next week…
This week was about tenderness, fun, play, connection, chillin’ and being cozy, expressive and fluid in my space. I even painted during the storm, which felt sooooo good. I’ll share when it’s all done!
I also added some impromptu drawing one night.
After I got into bed, I could feel that something needed out. I felt anxious and emotionally constipated, irritable. So I had my caregiver grab me a piece of paper, tape it to my iPad case, and I used one of my favorite pens to draw my internal atmosphere on the page.
I didn’t even think about it, I just watched as my hand drew a balloon, and inside the balloon was everything within me that needed to be acknowledged, heard, seen, and expelled. The minute my hand started tracing the lines I could feel my mind calming, my breath slowing, my heart quenching. I had given myself the love I needed through my hands moving on the page, without any judgement or expectations, just flowing freely, leading me through an ink-soaked catharsis.
This week I want us all to think about how acknowledging ourselves, listening to ourselves, saying YES to ourselves, can serve as the catalyst for a more empowered self in the outside world.
When we take the time to prioritize and know ourselves, when we create intimacy with our bodies, our minds, our spirit, our emotions — our entire humanness — it prepares us to then advocate for ourselves and say yes to ourselves and prioritize ourselves in other spaces. AND at the same time, it demands that love and respect from the rest of the world.
Spaces like the healthcare system, relationships, work/career, etc. can feel a little less ‘am I worthy?’ ‘Do I belong here?’ ‘Am I too much?’ ‘Can I do this?’ And a little more, ‘YES, I AM WORTHY. I am enough. These are my needs, you show up for me, I’ll show up for you, or BYEEEEEE.’
We can let go of the outcome of any situation and find ourselves showing up and advocating for ourselves in an authentic way. It might be messy and that’s ok — the world is wild and messy, and life is complicated, so we’re allowed to give ourselves a little grace. At least we tried.
You deserve to prioritize yourself. You know your body. And if you don’t feel like you do, you always have a chance to get to know her/them/him. 💜
*We can help each other and ourselves in so many ways — care has a vast range of identities and manifestations. So get creative with how you can show up!
TIP: become a paid subscriber and join me for our monthly New Moon Movement Therapy class for ALL BODIES.
A little inspiration from a queen:
Sending you love, care and courage,
KP
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